Built to last
by daphno
Summary: What happens when Jack practically deserts his team? And, when he finally takes the helm again, will he be able to win back their admiration and trust? Only my first ever fan fiction attempt.
1. Chapter 1

Torchwood fan fiction 2:

Built to Last.

"_You're getting married?"_

"_Yes… Rhys asked, while you were away."_

"… _And you said yes?"_

"_Well no one else will have me." _

Jack played the words over and over in his head as he drew vehemently on the lined paper on his desk that was supposed to be a report. Since Tosh and Owen's deaths, he'd had a lot of time to think. Time in which he'd replayed those words a thousand times or more. Time in which he'd become almost a burden to the remainder of the team, time in which Gwen, ever resourceful and compassionate, had taken up the reigns once again.

Jack stabbed the pen viciously into the paper, making a gaping hole. Of course he blamed himself for Tosh and Owen's deaths… who else was there to blame? And since that day a month ago he'd lost sight of the most important thing in his life: his team. He'd become moody and listless, he'd sat at the desk for hours on end without doing anything, he'd left Gwen and Ianto to deal with the alien-hunting they'd tackled before as a group of five… he'd left them in danger. And throughout all of this he expected Gwen to deal with the aftermath.

Ianto approached him from behind with a cup of coffee that he placed carefully on the desk. "Y'know, you can tell a lot about a person from what they doodle," he eyed Jack's piece of paper critically.

Jack, hardly amused, moved the paper so that Ianto could see. Ianto's eyes widened upon seeing the black zig-zags on the page.

"Happy now?" Jack sighed, "anything else you're supposed to check on? Anything else Gwen wants you to get out of me?"

Ianto jumped, "how did you…" He began, but froze and shook his head.

"Never mind," Jack said, "but you tell Gwen that if she wants something: get it herself." He hated himself for being so bitter towards the two of them. Ianto looked offended and hurried out of the office where Jack knew without looking that he had gone instantly to Gwen.

He didn't deserve the two of them. Neither one could bear to look him directly in the eye, both were afraid of the snappy and angry thing he'd become. Yet still… they still trusted him, wanted him to lead them even if they couldn't bear to say it.

The sound of the office door opening sliced through his thoughts, bringing him back to the here and now in which the only people he cared about were scared of him. He looked up from the desk, prepared for another onslaught from Gwen or Ianto acting on Gwen's behalf. Instead he found Gwen looking down at him, pity and sadness on her face. The same depth of compassion that had won her a place in Torchwood… and Jack's heart.

"Yes?" He sighed, forcing his voice to be as soft as he could.

She did not reply, did not attempt to mask the display of tenderness that was in her wide eyes.

"Gwen?"

"Have you forgotten about Torchwood Jack? Do you just… not care any more?"

"What?" He spluttered, unsure how to answer.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She shouted, "why have you left us again?"

He stood up and moved around the desk so that he was standing only a foot away from her. The pain and desperation in her eyes forced him to see that, no matter what he felt inside, he could not expect Gwen and Ianto to stay strong whilst he fell apart. "I haven't left you," he shook his head.

"No? Then why does it feel like you have? Where were you yesterday when we had to track down that Vespian intruder in Newport? Or the other week when we had that Black Winged Turtle? Hey? Or the week before - _where were you Jack_?!"

He hated himself for being the cause of such anger in her, despised himself. "I was… I…" But he could not bring himself to answer. The truth was he wasn't really sure where he had been: he didn't remember the events Gwen was talking about because he hadn't been paying attention when she'd told him. Or when Ianto had. Or when they'd both called him on the Hub telephone asking for his assistance. He'd been completely out of touch with Torchwood for the past month. Even when, three weeks ago, Gwen and Ianto had headed out alone to capture a rogue Weevil. It was a routine procedure, one they had handled for years in groups of two. But three weeks ago Gwen and Ianto had been working on every single alien, monster, ghost, missing person and rogue time-traveller the team encountered: they no longer had the support of three other fully-functioning team-mates. They were tired. Dispirited. Gwen's hands had slipped on the stun gun which she dropped, Ianto had turned back to help her, the Weevil had launched forwards and locked its great jaws on Ianto's arm that had been flung out to push Gwen to safety. By the time Gwen had finally stunned and captured the Weevil, Ianto was bleeding heavily. She'd called Jack but of course… he'd been out of touch.

He sighed, shook his head to rid it of useless thoughts and massaged his temples with his hands. "Alright, I get it. I'm sorry Gwen. Sorry."

"You're sorry? And I suppose you think that's enough to fix everything?"

"No…" He dropped his hands and met her eyes hopefully, playfully, "yes?"

At last she smiled and unlocked her hands from her hips.

"I'm sorry for being such a total waste to the team. I'm sorry for not being there when you and Ianto needed me. Sorry for leaving you to pick up the slack - again." He needed to make her understand, he needed her support, and Ianto's, if he was ever going to take control again. "It won't happen again. Brownie promise." He held up three fingers in a salute.

"When were you in the Brownies?"

"Long story. _Odd _story." He grinned fondly. She did not return the grin, but her features softened again and she shrugged hopelessly at him.

"Whatever," she sighed, "you know we'll go on trusting you, and I doubt I could ever convince Ianto to go for mutiny."

"Don't you dare," he waggled a playful finger at her, eyeing her in mock suspicion. "So now that this dysfunctional family has undergone an oath of loyalty, how 'bout we get down to some real work?" The truth was, he was ready for it, even if there were only three of them. Torchwood would go on, without Owen, without Tosh. "What've we got?" He asked Gwen now, and was pleased to see her expression brighten. She hurried from his office, Jack tailing behind, and stopped at the main computer, hefting the keyboard into her arms and typing rapidly.

"Rift activity," she said, "short and sweet but it was one powerful surge. Ianto!" He appeared between Gwen and Jack as if he'd been waiting nearby and Jack knew, through pure instinctive knowledge of his team, that Ianto had pretty much followed Gwen's orders in this way for the past month. Always nearby, always waiting, always willing to help. And all the while with a leader who didn't care, didn't even notice how tired the both of them were looking.

Gwen had dark circles under her eyes, her eyes that were bloodshot and half closed. Her hair was straggling and hadn't seen a comb for a good few days. She was also wearing the same outfit that she'd worn yesterday, and the day before, because with the workload that the two of them had tackled alone, she'd barely had time to drink coffee never mind get home to change.

The same went for Ianto, except he seemed a little better off. His suit was grey and he'd not had time to iron it before he'd hurried into it that morning: Gwen had been calling incessantly about the up rise in rift activity.

Jack placed a hand on each of their shoulders and felt both of them tense. It hurt him, literally pained him in his heart, to feel them both shirk away from his hand. Ianto had not yet looked his way, had not acknowledged his 'return'. Was this how it was going to be now?

And Gwen? She had soldiered on, as ever, but something in her tone of voice, her actions, told Jack that something wasn't quite right with her.

"Ianto," she said now, turning to face him and dislodging Jack's hand in the same movement. Jack's heart sank another mile when Ianto did the same. "Ianto, did you manage to track down that rogue Weevil we were trailing last week?"

"Sure did," he replied, "it'd managed to high-tail it all the way to Newport."

"Newport?" She raised her eyebrows, "wow, they're getting brainy on us. Did you pull it in?"

"Eventually, reckon a couple of civilians might've seen me though. I think I managed to pass it off as my diseased cousin but…" He let the sentence hang ominously.

Jack sighed inwardly. This never would've happened on his watch, a Weevil would never have made it to Newport. Not that he was blaming Gwen but… he should've been there.

"Riiiight," Gwen frowned, "at least we got it in. That's better than nothing. About that rift activity," she gestured to the computer screen, where a blue dot was blinking repeatedly. "It's in the bay area, I don't reckon it's more than a couple of Weevils at the least… at the most - I don't know. Anyhow we can tackle it tomorrow."

"Permission to leave ship and return ashore, skipper?" Ianto gave Gwen a cock-eyed smile. Now he was calling her 'skipper'? Jack frowned and awaited her answer.

Apparently she was in a playful mood after Jack's 'return'. "Permission granted, shipmate." The two saluted each other before Ianto gave Jack a funny little nod that Jack guessed was supposed to be a 'goodbye'. Then Ianto was gone, through the cog door to activates unknown.

Only Gwen remained, resetting the keyboard on the desk and crossing around the room in search of coffee.

"You should take some time off," Jack announced.

"Yeah right," she scoffed, abandoning the search and collapsing on the sofa. "Leaving you - you're hardly in the running for 'Boss-of-the-year' awards. And Ianto - who'd grind to a halt if he didn't have someone's orders to follow. Yeah right."

He was surprised that his bitterness had affected Gwen in this way. He'd expected the hostility, Ianto's coldness, both of them grouping together. But never, not once, had he expected Gwen to become as bitter and angry as he had.

"Know what we need?" He perked up, sitting beside her. He took it as a good sign that she did not leap up again.

"No," she shook her head, "no way. No bloody team-building exercises, no trips to the countryside, no little excursions or anything like that."

"Relax," he laughed, "too suspicious Gwen Cooper. No - I was talking about Martha."

"Martha? As in Martha Jones? As in works-for-UNIT Martha?"

"Yes, who else would I be talking about?"

She ignored this and Jack could tell she was pondering Martha. "Yeah, alright. You have her number?"

"'Course." Though he'd have to check.

"Isn't she getting married?"

"Yeah, soon. No!" He gasped and laughed to see the look of delight in Gwen's face, that look he hadn't seen since her own wedding before it'd gone terribly wrong. "No way Gwen, I'm not inviting her down here so you two girls can go all misty eyed over her wedding."

"Why not?" But she was laughing. And that felt good. To be laughing again, at ease, comfortable with his team. Well - half his team. Well - one team member. But it was a start.

"I'll call her tomorrow morning," he said as he stood up, "we could even hold off on the Weevils until she gets here."

"Sure, lovely arriving present for her," Gwen stood beside him, "but no, I think Ianto's pretty keen to get them out of the way as soon as possible." I think Ianto's pretty keen to get out of _my _way, Jack thought but said nothing. "I'm really glad you're… back." Gwen's brow crumpled and she hugged him awkwardly.

"_You're getting married?"_

"_Yes… Rhys asked, while you were away."_

"… _And you said yes?"_

"_Well no one else will have me." _

The words came back again, biting angrily at him as he held her against his chest, her heart beating life out into him. A different kind of life to the one he already possessed. His was eternal, lonely and absolute. Gwen's was faltering, compassionate, uncertain and warm. In fact, so warm as he held her to him that he might've fallen asleep.

If Gwen's phone hadn't gone off. If she hadn't pulled away from him and answered the call. If her face hadn't lit up when she'd heard that voice.

"Hey," she grinned, "no I'm just finishing up now… I don't care - get a curry or something… I'll be there in a minute… love you too… bye."

"I'm guessing that wasn't your dentist," Jack said dryly.

"No - Rhys. I've got to go, I'll see you tomorrow. Don't forget to call Martha."

"Right-o skipper."

She stuck her tongue out at him, grabbed her bag and jacket from one of the desks and hurried out of the door.

Leaving Jack. With his shadows of memories of Tosh and Owen, of an Ianto that smiled happily, that returned his words, of a Gwen that wasn't responsible for the team's wellbeing, that was innocent and perky and that hugged him enthusiastically not awkwardly.

But it was a start.


	2. Chapter 2: On hunting the Weevils

_His phone call to Martha the next morning was sweet relief. Here was someone who wasn't afraid to talk to him, who answered his call with a cheerful voice and, 'God I've missed you.' Who didn't need asking twice about visiting Cardiff, who promised to drive down later that day. _

"_Was that Martha?" Gwen asked when he returned from his office. The only thing she'd said to him all day._

_When Gwen and Ianto had arrived at the Hub that morning, the air had been tense and suffocating. Ianto had got there first, on time as ever, and sat at his desk staring holes into the computer screen. No 'good morning' for Jack, no happy smile, no 'how's your day so far?'. Nothing. _

_Gwen had arrived twenty agonising, silent minutes later all smiles and laughter. Which had, of course, subsided when she'd seen Jack. Replaced by a brief smile and a short nod before she hurried over to Ianto to discuss how they were going to tackle the Weevils._

"_Yeah, she said she'll come down today."_

_Ianto's head shot up, "you called Martha down?" Was that directed to Jack or to Gwen?_

_Jack answered regardless, "yup. Thought we could do with a little pick-me-up since the atmosphere around here isn't exactly… peachy." _

_Ianto nodded slowly, eyes returning to the computer screen. "Right then. Better get on with the Weevils then hadn't we?" Dry. Monotonous. Heartbreaking._

_Jack stared imploringly at Gwen, who seemed to understand his unspoken plea. "You'll come with us Jack?" She asked, "we could do with the extra hand. Well two hands. We don't know how many Weevils there's going to be."_

_Jack was a split second from answering when he caught sight of Ianto watching Gwen, Ianto shaking his head rapidly, Ianto mouthing 'no' to Gwen. Jack's heart was crushed beneath a mountainous boulder. Why wouldn't Ianto forgive him? Why was Gwen still wary of him? And why the hell wouldn't the two of them trust him, let him take the lead again? Why did he need asking by his own team to go on a hunt?_

"_I'll come with," Jack shrugged. Yeah, and if it comes to it - force Ianto to see._

_Where were they? Jack craned his neck to see the top of the trees that glowered threateningly above him. They must've been twenty metres high and swaying gently in the breeze. Birds zipped in and out of the leaves, hell-bent on whatever it was birds did, cawing and trilling to each other: intruders! Humans! Torchwood! But where were the Weevils? Jack turned his gaze to the floor where Ianto was kneeling, pointing out large and clumsy footprints in the mud._

_The drive there had been absolute torture. Ianto and Gwen had, in the month that Jack had been 'absent', come up with a strict driving routine: today was Ianto's turn. Gwen had sat in the passenger seat, reiterating directions from a mass of technology that she cupped in her hands. Jack silently accepted that he was expected to sit in the back seat._

_Fifteen minutes later and they were either helplessly lost or on track in search of the Weevils, Jack couldn't tell. But if the latter was the case then the Weevils were hiding out in one of the most woebegone patches of woodland in all of South Wales._

_Gwen nudged him in the ribs to shake him from his thoughts and shoved a gun into his hands. "Wake up!" She snapped in annoyance, "didn't you hear Ianto? Those tracks __were _Weevils, and they headed north over that hill just a couple of minutes ago. Ianto's gone after them now and we need to hurry up!" She wasted no time and pelted off through the woodland, deserting the path and clambering over fallen tree trunks and huge piles of rotting leaves. "Come on Jack!" She shouted over her shoulder. 

That's right, Jack thought, wake up. He set off after Gwen but in seconds she was out of sight. And shouting distance, apparently, when he called her name five minutes later. He carried on pushing through the trees and tripping over twigs until he came to a large, clammy clearing. 

Gun raised and ready, he circled around the clearing in search of Gwen, Ianto, the Weevils, anything. 

"Ianto? Gwen?" The only answer to his voice was an angry bird and the rough rustling of leaves.

"Hellooo?" The word echoed ominously around him, rippling through the empty space. "Anyone? Torchwood, where are you?" 

The rustling intensified around him, until it was joined by hurried, loud footsteps marching towards him. Ianto, he sighed. Or Gwen. Either one would do.

What approached him from the trees, however, was neither of his Welsh team mates. Nor was it a Weevil. It stared at him in incomprehension with large, wide green eyes that were deep and sunken in its round, pale skull. It was at least eight feet tall and had jaws consisting of three rows of magnificently shiny, sharp yellow teeth. Its bulk was wide and muscular to the degree that Jack knew he would never be able to take it alone.

Not that he had any intentions to. The incomprehension dissipated from its glaring eyes and was replace by anger, hunger and madness reminiscent of a charging bull. And charge it did, directly towards Jack who was suspended in a state of shock.

"Oh," he whispered blankly. The first alien he'd encountered in a month was right in front of him, and it was dead set on killing him. Great. Not exactly the comeback he'd imagined.

He rose the gun higher. "I don't want to shoot you, but believe me I will if you don't back away!" It merely blinked at him stupidly for a second or two, before returning to charge-and-wipe-out mode. Even better. "Not a big talker, eh? No problemo." He fired a warning shot into the air; the birds scattered like tiny ants above him in a flurry of squawking and jittering. Again the unknown alien stopped, blinked dumbly for a moment and then scurried forwards towards Jack. "Don't give up do you?" He began to consider alternate means of communication. Shooting the thing would accomplish nothing except its death, which Jack wanted to avoid at all costs. The stun gun in his pocket meant for the Weevils suddenly seemed insignificant, like a little child's toy. 

Before he had much chance to react in any way other than to stare at the alien, a Weevil spilled out into the clearing clumsily and staggered in between Jack and the… whatever it was. The Weevil seemed small in comparison, harmless even, and stared up at the other alien with a cat-got-the-cream expression. The other alien stopped charging for Jack and reached towards the Weevil instead, swinging its lumbering arms to grasp the Weevil's fat neck and bite deep into it.

"No!" Jack bellowed and ran forwards before grinding to a halt. What good could he do anyway? That thing would stop him before he had a chance to save the Weevil. 

The alien met Jack's eyes, blood covering its face and dripping off onto the floor. He could almost hear its brain ticking away, considering whether to charge for Jack or not. Before it made a decision Jack heard a gunshot in the distance and, as quick as it had appeared, the alien ran back into the trees leaving the Weevil crumpled on the floor, unmoving.

"Shit!" Jack yelled. He clicked on the headset in his ear, "team?" Nothing, just meaningless crackles and white noise. 

Icy fear rippled up and down his spine. What if that thing had gotten hold of Ianto or Gwen? After watching it kill the Weevil with such ease, Jack doubted that two humans could survive an onslaught from it, he also doubted the effectiveness of their small handguns against its thick hide.

He heard another gunshot, this one much closer, and a series of frantic, laboured breaths. A bird whistled. Ghostly trees shivered. Not too far away in the woodland someone gasped and choked.

"Gwen?" Jack shouted as he ran towards the sound, "Ianto?" Another choking sound sent him running a little to his left, where he saw a dark shape lying on the floor. Close by was a discarded handgun. Gwen's. 

"Gwen!" He fell down onto the soil beside her body. She was covered in blood that glistened grotesquely in the dim light. As he peeled back her jacket he was hardly aware that he was praying for the blood to come from a surface wound, a scratch, anything so long as it wasn't deep and life threatening. As he searched for the source of the blood, Gwen did not stir, but her chest continued to heave with staggering breaths. She was alive, he sighed, but unconscious. 

Her nose was bloodied but not broken, and was the cause of the majority of the blood on her face. There was another cut on her arm that Jack knew instantly was caused by the alien's claws. Small scratches and bite marks littered her stomach until Jack found the main source of blood: a long gash running the length of her left lower leg, where the alien had locked its teeth into her as she attempted to run from it.

Jack swore and tore strips from his shirt to bandage her leg. The white material was soaked and reddened in seconds. He used more of his shirt to wipe away the blood from her face and to stem the blood flow from the cut on her arm.

When he had finished she was battered and pitiful, but at least the bleeding was under control. Now all he had to do was find some way of getting her out of there before finding Ianto. At that thought he felt sick to the stomach: what if Ianto was out there, somewhere, as badly hurt as Gwen but with no way of signalling to Jack?

The situation went downhill rapidly when Gwen woke up, groggy at first and struggling to focus, but when she realised that she was covered in her own blood and in immense pain she began to scream and sob.

"Gwen!" Jack clamped a hand over her mouth, "Gwen shut up. You have to listen to me, stop screaming. You're fine, the bleeding's under control. But if you make a sound it'll bring that monster back to us." She nodded and fell silent, inspecting the extent of her wounds and whimpering in pain.

"Where's Ianto?" Her voice was strained with pain. 

"I don't know…" Jack admitted, and it hurt him to even consider what might be happening to Ianto. 

"Jesus Jack, that thing came out of nowhere. I didn't even have time to react, it just came at me. And when I tried to run away it whacked me in my nose. I fell over and that's when it bit my leg. I swear it drank my blood! Then a Weevil came towards it and - God Jack! - it killed the Weevil. Then there was gunshot, Ianto I guess, and it ran off. I couldn't walk so I just lay there, got my gun and fired into the air, hoping someone might find me. I haven't got a clue where Ianto went."

"Can you walk?"

"I can try." She pulled herself up using a tree and swayed dangerously on her feet. "I'm fine." She took a step forwards and, as soon as she'd put pressure on her injured left leg, she fell towards the ground.

"Okay, you can't walk," Jack caught her and slung her arm around his neck, "never mind, we'll find Ianto like this."

They began to walk through the woodland, their speed decreased significantly by Gwen's limp and her need to stop every two minutes to tighten the makeshift bandages. It was during one of these breaks that Jack's phone rang shrilly.

"Who the hell is that?" Jack demanded quietly, though his heart thundered with deafening volume: Ianto!

"Ianto?!" He bellowed into the headset, desperation for Ianto's voice seeping down the line.

But the answering voice was a woman's, angry at his hasty greeting, but nonetheless he was pleased to hear her. "Well hello to you too Captain Polite."

"Martha!" He gasped, relief warming his cold heart, "Martha am I glad to hear your voice!"

"Well that's good, maybe you could tell me where the hell you are. I'm at the Hub: it's deserted. Remember, you told me to visit, the least you could do is let me in."

"What?" He frowned, "no. No, no, no."

"No? What do you m-"

"No Martha listen! We need your help. We're stuck in the middle of nowhere, there's a great, ugly alien on the loose that we have no way of stopping. Our weapons are useless. The thing's mauled Gwen half to death and I haven't got a clue where Ianto is." It shocked him to realise how close to tears he actually was. On his right Gwen sank down onto a fallen tree trunk, closing her eyes to blot out the pain. Experience had taught Jack that she was slipping back into unconsciousness, she didn't have time to waste. "Martha! Can you come out here and help us?"

"I'll do my best," her voice was determined though she was obviously struggling to understand. "Just tell me where you are."

Now there was a question Jack couldn't answer. "Gwen!" He barked at her, "Gwen, where are we? I need to give Martha directions." 

She opened her eyes halfway and stared glassily at him. "Martha? Martha's here?"

"No, just tell me where we are Gwen."

"I don't… I don't know."

"Yes you do," he bent down in front of her and clicked his fingers in her face, "come on Gwen Cooper, wake up. I need you. You directed us out here, you must know."

"R-right. Yeah. What? Um… We're in Park's Wood. Pike's Wood. Thirteen miles north of Butetown. No - sixteen miles."

"Pike's Wood? Sixteen miles?"

She nodded hazily before slumping on to her side, unconscious.

"Shit! Martha - It's Pike's Wood, sixteen miles north of Butetown. Got that?"

"Got that Captain."

"Be as quick as you can. I'll need you to take Gwen while I go after Ianto. Hurry!"

"I'll do my best Jack, but it's still quite a way."

"If anyone can do it it's you Martha Jones. You saved the whole world."

"Yeah, there was that."

"Quick!"

"Will do." She hung up.

Jack lifted Gwen into his arms and clambered through the dense woodland. He had to find the path, otherwise Martha would have no chance of finding them. Gwen swooned in his arms, mumbling incoherent things. She wanted Rhys, she wanted Ianto and she wanted water. She asked for a doctor, for chicken soup, she asked for Tosh. She wanted to speak to Owen, to Jack and to her mother. The pain and blood loss had sent her delirious. 

The day was just getting better and better. And he still was no closer to finding Ianto, if anything he was walking further away from him.

A terrifying half an hour later Jack knelt on the ground, cradling his head in his hands, calling Ianto's name over and over until it rang in his ears. On the muddy ground in front of him lay Gwen. She was less than half alive now, her breathing had slowed, her muttering had stopped and the bleeding had increased. 

What had begun as a routine Weevil hunt had been blown into nightmarish proportions. Jack rocked back and forth on the path, his mind pulsating with panic for Ianto and for Gwen, his hands drenched in fresh blood. Where was Martha?

Jack wanted nothing more than to be reunited with Ianto, to prove that he had not left him. That he was still there for his team. But he could not bear to leave Gwen alone, so close to death. Where was Martha?

"Jack… Jack?" Her voice floated down to him as if it belonged to a heavenly angel and, when he looked up to find her bending down over Gwen, checking for a pulse, it seemed to him as if she was his celestial saviour.

"Martha, thank god!" He exclaimed, jumping to his feet with sudden energy.

"What the hell happened Jack?" She demanded, tilting Gwen's head back. 

"Is she alright?"

"No." That single word sent more panic through Jack's mind than he'd felt all day. "She needs more than a doctor Jack, she needs a hospital! She's lost too much blood, way too much blood."

"Shiiiit!" He yelled, kicking the ground. "It's all my fault. They ran off Martha, Gwen and Ianto. I tried to follow them but…" He gestured helplessly to Gwen's lifeless form.

"You did your best," she reassured him. But had he? He couldn't help but wonder… would things have been different if there hadn't been a great divide in his team? If the three of them had communicated better? If they'd both been willing to trust him more? And through all of his doubts he found himself pleading that when - not if - he found Ianto he would be in better condition than Gwen. 

"Help me get her into my car," Martha instructed bravely, her UNIT training shining through as she took instant control of the situation.

Jack once again lifted Gwen up and was relieved to feel her heart fluttering weakly, albeit slowed and dangerously close to stopping altogether. Martha's car, he was more than relieved to see, was parked very close to where they had been talking, and he lay Gwen on the back seat. He arranged her arms neatly over her chest and felt suddenly as if he was saying his final farewell to her. Tears prickled behind his eyes and his voice caught in his throat. What would he say? Nothing… he kissed her pale cheek and stepped back to embrace Martha.

"I'll look after her now," Martha nodded gently, "I'll get her to a hospital, I think I passed one on the way. She'll be fine, don't worry." But he would, of course he would. "I'll come back as soon as I can in case…." She didn't need to finish the sentence, the end of it hung at the forefront of their minds: in case Ianto is as bad… or worse.

"Go." Jack ordered her, "I'll call you if anything else happens. If…" There it was again. Ianto. "Just go, please Martha, hurry." She nodded, crying Jack's tears for him. She scrambled into the driver's seat, checked Gwen's pulse one last time and reversed back down the path. In twenty seconds she had disappeared from view.

A single tear fell from Jack's eyes. Gwen would be fine, he lied. Another tear raced down his cheek. And what about Ianto? Another tear, and another, until his face was shining with them as he ran back into the woodland.

Ianto. He had to find Ianto.


	3. Chapter 3

With many, many thanks to AutumnxAngel for beta reading for me. Your help has been invaluable. :)

Ianto. He had to find Ianto. Where was Ianto? That question ricocheted painfully around his head a thousand million times as he hurtled away from the retreating sounds of Martha's car. The name was synchronised into the beating of his heart. Ianto. Ianto. Ianto.

His legs trembled beneath him, weak with terror and wild with panic, but he continued clambering aimlessly through the woodland, devoid of any sense of direction. Only one thing in the world made sense now: his team.

Ianto. He turned his thoughts into speech, quiet at first, barely audible for fear of the dangerous alien, but before long his one-worded mantra was frantic and screaming: "Ianto!"

No answer.

What had he expected? A joyful reunion with the healthy, intact Welshman? For Ianto to come running towards him, arms outstretched, all tears and apologies? No…

Jack stumbled clumsily into another clearing and froze instinctively. There, on the ground, bent over the decapitated body of a Weevil, crouched the alien, lips pulsating with lust for the blood that oozed out over the Weevil's shoulders and onto the leaf-strewn floor. It stared intently at the red pools of blood as they spread, its mind lost with thirst. Jack cringed when it raised a clawed hand, already moist with Gwen's blood, to scoop a handful of liquid from the space where the Weevil's head had once been. It drank like a child, uncoordinated and greedy, blood trickling down its wide chin and smearing onto its blushed cheeks.

Wonderful, Jack groaned inside, a vampirical, lunatic alien on the loose. And its thirst was apparently insatiable. He considered his options for the moment and opted for hiding. He backed away into the nearest tree before he realised what he was doing. Great Jack, he scolded himself, a giant monster's hardly ten feet away and you hide in a tree?

The monster did not seem fazed by his sudden intrusion upon its supper, ignoring him to continue drinking with dissipating enthusiasm.

Jack almost fell out of the tree when something brushed his shoulder lightly. A leaf, he passed it off, just a leaf. After Daleks and the Master - you're spooked by a leaf? He soon abandoned the leaf theory when the same something touched his shoulder again, this time stronger and with a sharp poke.

He looked up abruptly and felt his heart rocket into oblivion as the hammering of his heart changed from that of fear to elation: Ianto. There was Ianto, crouched above him in the tree, clinging on for dear life, sheer terror radiating from his shaken, battered form. In the dimness of the trees Jack could only see the other man's pale face, so his desire to check for injuries was put on hold. But it was Ianto, and he was alive, which would have to do.

He'd never felt a stronger urge to hug the Welshman, but the tree hardly catered for such things.

"Ianto," his voice was breathy with relief.

The other man blinked. "It's demonic Jack," his voice was stony, "it's more than a Weevil or any alien we've seen before - it's evil." His voice became louder with fear and, in the gentle light, Jack could see the marks of tears on his face.

"Shh," he made a hand gesture, "it might hear us."

"No. It won't. It might be ugly as anything but it sure isn't that smart. Its senses of sight and sound aren't exactly top notch - it relies on taste and smell. It can smell blood." Considering its apparent never ending fetish for blood, that made sense.

Jack looked down at his hands. They were awash with Gwen's blood. Could the creature smell it?

"And are you…?" He asked nervously, finally voicing his racing concerns.

"No I'm not bleeding," Ianto replied, "but I think my leg's broken. I heard it snap when I was running, but to be honest I was more concerned with the super sized Weevil on my back than the pain. I made it up the tree and that's when the Weevil turned up."

Jack's heart literally shuddered with relief. Ianto was fine. A broken bone was nothing compared to what could have happened; what almost happened. "Thank God for the Weevils then?"

Ianto did not laugh. "Jack… what happened to Gwen? We were running, following the Weevil tracks, then suddenly she wasn't beside me anymore. I called her name. There was a scratching noise, some growling and something that sounded like a punch but I can't be sure. Gwen was nowhere. I didn't know what to do... God Jack I panicked. All I could think was fire a shot into the air, and when I did that thing charged out of nowhere. It was headed straight for me. Oh God Jack… what if I've killed her? What if she's dead because I…"

Ianto's worries were heartbreaking, the few feet between them was a few feet too many. "Ianto listen," Jack tried to make his voice strong enough for the other man to focus on. "Gwen's alive. I found her; she's with Martha. That shot you fired probably saved her life."

"Is she bad?"

Jack considered how much to tell Ianto. Couldn't most of it wait until they were away from danger? "Bad. Bleeding, bruised, unconscious."

"Will she live?"

Would she?

"I don't know." His blood froze for a second as each and every cell considered one possibility. One single, crushing thought.

_Gwen, lying on the hospital bed, dead. Gwen, pale and cold to the touch. Gwen, so caring and sensitive, lifeless. Her last moments had been painful, her last words of her husband. No mention of Jack. Her mother… Jack would have to call her and do his best to comfort her. Then he would Retcon her. And Rhys? Inconsolable, enflamed by rage and grief. He'd have to Retcon Rhys too, though he knew how Gwen had always avoided it. How could you ever console someone for losing something like this? When it was all over he'd want to Retcon himself… the memories would be too much. To know that he had lost her would be too much... Her wedding had been painful enough… her death, and the knowledge that he could never follow her beyond in spirit, would be unspoilt torture. To live each day for all of eternity with the memories of Gwen, so hopeful, so smart and so trusting would be unthinkable. What life was there if she was dead?_

"Jack?" Ianto was whispering, as scared of the haunted look on Jack's face as he was of the monster.

"I don't know. Let's just concentrate on getting out of here first. Any ideas?"

"I don't fancy a round or two with that," Ianto gestured down to the alien that was now sucking viciously from the Weevil's wound.

"We could take it together" he lied, "just think of it as a chubby Weevil."

"Compared to that thing, Weevil's are cute. It makes Janet look like a fluffy hamster. And my leg's broken, remember? I'll hardly be much good."

"You're always good Ianto, don't forget that." No matter had what happened in the past month.

The alien finally withdrew its teeth from the gouges in the Weevil's body about five minutes after they had witnessed it lap up and gulp down every drop of blood that it could. It stood on its large, heavy feet and swayed dizzily, light headed as if it were drunk. It spun full-circle; Jack and Ianto cringing when its eyes almost met theirs. It grunted to the Weevil, as if disappointed that it could no longer provide more blood, and staggered off, nose in the air, away from the clearing.

Jack breathed a hasty sigh of relief before jumping down from the tree and extending a hand to help Ianto. The stench of the Weevil's body was sickening; it had been dead for at least an hour now.

"I'm so glad you're ok," Jack flung his arms around Ianto quickly, before the other man could protest. The past few hours had taught Jack many things. What remained of his team was lost without him, floundering and open to attack. Despite weaknesses, they were loyal and brave when all others would not have been. They were precious and vulnerable, fragile and so, so very human… and his.

He had wronged them in too many ways. His selfish, thoughtless actions had led them here today; had left Ianto wary but alive, had left Gwen's life hanging in limbo.

"I'm..."

"You're sorry. I know." Ianto hugged back. "Gwen said. Before - in the Hub - it's not that I didn't believe you, it's that… You surprised me Jack. You left us - again."

"I know…" It was like it had been with Gwen, the guilt came crashing over him like a relentless tidal wave. "And I hate myself for it. If I could change it, you know I would. I'd give anything to go back and change it. But I can't. Instead we have to put up with the consequences. And right now that mean's a trip to the hospital, shipmate." The former joke went unnoticed by Ianto, whose eyes were narrowed and fixed on a point somewhere above Jack's left shoulder.

"Ianto? I have to know - do you forgive me? Are you with me?"

A smile flittered to the surface, "'course. Always." Loyal to the end - that was his Ianto.

"C'mon," Jack plucked at Ianto's arm and draped it around his shoulder. The two limped on, Ianto hopping to avoid placing his wounded leg on the ground and wincing every time it got jarred by the motion. "Y'know," Jack grinned for the first time that day, "I'm getting tired of carrying people around like this." He laughed and, finally, Ianto's resolve broke and he chuckled.

"Which hospital is it?"

"Pass. Let me call Martha."

As he did so, Ianto leaned against a nearby tree trunk, examining his leg with shaking hands.

"Don't you go passing out on me as well," Jack warned as he pressed 'call'. "It's ringing... Hello, Martha?"

"Jack! It's about time! Where are you? Is-"

"Ianto's fine. A little shaken, but nothing a few cups of tea and a plaster cast won't sort out. Where are you?"

"The hospital, Cardiff City General." She offered no specifics, which worried Jack.

"Gwen?" He prodded, daring to hope for the best and yet fearing the worst.

"She's stable - for now. It was touch and go when I first got here. She stopped breathing in the car and the doctors had trouble bringing her round. They've given her a good few units of blood but they say the extent of her wounds is still shocking. I made up some story about her getting attacked by a dog or something." Jack could hear his heart pounding as she paused. " Nothing's certain yet - but it's looking hopeful." At last, some good news.

"Rhys?" Jack ventured.

"Is here and licensed to kill. He's livid Jack. He's cornered me a few times demanding to know where you are. His exact words were: 'Where the bloody hell is that Torchwood bloke and what's he done to my wife now?' I had to call him... as soon as I arrived at the hospital they said I had to notify the next of kin. I didn't know who to call but I could hardly phone her mum could I?"

"It's alright. I'll explain to Rhys." _Yeah, and pound him for being more concerned about my whereabouts than his wife's wellbeing._

"Want me to come and drive you here?"

"Would you? I know it's a lot to ask but..."

"It's fine."

In the background Jack heard a door slam loudly, followed by the heavy footsteps of someone approaching Martha.

"That him?" Someone grunted. Male. Welsh. Rhys. Damn.

"Yes," she sighed. More indistinct words by the Welshman and Martha coughed suspiciously, "No you can't speak with him. Look Mr. Williams, I suggest that you go back in there and sit with your wife." Even more grumbling, then more stomping footsteps and another slammed door. "I swear Jack, if you don't knock him out I will."

"You have my blessing Martha Jones."

Her laughter was tense and tired. "I'll be there in a minute."

Jack supported Ianto's weight until they reached the path, where Ianto insisted that he was well enough to walk and began to hobble painfully along the dirt trail. Jack hovered behind him, ready to extend a hand to help. He'd learnt his lesson - where his team was involved he would always extend a hand.

They reached the end of the woodland at last, and sat on the edge of the curb. It felt strange to be out of that claustrophobic atmosphere of trees. It was as if they had been freed after a long imprisonment underground, during which many horrific things had taken place, events that mingled together awkwardly like congealing blood.

Cars zipped past them absently. Occasionally a driver or passenger would look their way, but mostly the inhabitants of Butetown kept to their daily business, not sparing a second for the two dishevelled men sitting side by side on the roadside.

"What're we going to do about the… um… thing?" Ianto queried.

"I vote against the old 'divide-and-conquer' routine for this one. We'll need as much strength as we can get. We'll need Martha, we'll need bigger weapons, we'll definitely need Gwen. Let's just make it to the hospital in one piece shall we?"

"Yes. But there's an alien just running around Pike's Wood isn't there? Won't people notice?"

"Nah," Jack shrugged, "you think people pay that much attention? We'll deal with it as soon as we can. Meanwhile - we have our own monsters to deal with." He pictured Rhys and did not envy Martha.

"Right." Ianto shifted on the kerb and took Jack's hand loosely in his own.

It wasn't much, but it was a start.


End file.
